ragnaroktopus:

i’m going through my old notes on facebook and i found one from 2008 that has a bunch of movie ideas in it and one of them is a superhero movie with people with special powers and i just

• One man can fix picture frames without touching them. If they are crooked, he will right them.
• Photosynthesis. She is all green, and when she is hungry, she says “Wait up, guys!“ and stands still while making chewing noises as she soaks up the sun.
• Teleportation. But only to the nearest Whole Foods Market location. If Whole Foods is closed, they are teleported to Abercrombie.
• Talk to owls. But only the brown spotted owl, which happens to not be native to the area in which the hero lives.
• Power to lower people’s cholesterol.
• Power to turn on lights by clapping. However, this power does not work when the lights are actually clap-on lights.
• Ability to smell cooking bacon from far away.
• Walk through automatic doors (later revealed to be fake – but everyone reconciles with him and they get along fine)