I never imagined I would be so comfortable with my vulnerability that I would let myself be enveloped by the love of a person who calls me silly sweet things like “lil nanner” and sneaks me “miss uuuu” texts in corporate meetings and makes unconscious happy sleepy noises when they roll over in the middle of the night and find their other half lying there.
survived the holidays, in no small part thanks to Jake, who has been such a trooper this month. well, this year. (this life if we’re gonna be honest here.) throughout all of the caretaker drama, family obligations, and work stress, we’ve shared some of our deepest conversations and secrets and become even more obnoxiously one-brained than before. all it takes for us to communicate is a hand squeeze. that’s something I wished for all my life but dismissed as impossible and non-existent in this world. wasn’t I blessedly wrong.
I’ve been a little down with a head cold and stress from work, and last night I was chilling and doing some StumbleUpon. I came across one of those silly lists called “ways to melt your girl’s heart,” and the first one was dancing spontaneously with her. I kind of smiled at that, but Jake isn’t a dancer at all; we had that conversation recently, and I cheerfully said it was fine, I’ve always danced alone.
mind you, I didn’t mention that I’d read this.
a few minutes later, with Pandora playing some piano music in the background, I got up and so did he. “are you doing okay?” he asked me, and I smiled and nodded.
then suddenly we were slow-dancing.
for several minutes.
I definitely melted.
and afterwards I told him about the list and he just smiled and winked in that mysterious and sexy way.
damn, he’s good.
permanence is beautiful.
to my ally, my pillar, my media naranja, my heart’s delight, my muse:
thank you for showing up in a Facebook message and sweeping me the hell off my feet. ‘cause this is wonderful. this is every little!August dream and hope plus a million more.