no sorry santorum you have to carry your dead presidential campaign to full term
BEST. POST. EVER.
Horrible Movie Ideas
The Color Purple Rain: Prince leads slaves to freedom on his motorcycle, thus beginning a journey to the purifying waters of Lake Minnetonka
The Green Mile High Club: Death row inmates are granted one conjugal plane ride in this Conair sequel
2001 A Space Honda Odyssey: A wacky suburban family finds out that their 2001 Honda Odyssey is a spaceship. Now it’s up to them to save Earth
10 Things I hate about Jews: Schindler’s List as seen from the other side. Also titled, Himmler’s List
The Lion King’s Speech: Phil Collins spends hours trying to teach a Lion to talk
Venus De Milo & Otis: Story of a pug dragging an ancient sculpture up mount Olympus
Ted Turner & Hooch: Billionaire has annoying slobbery dog put down
Yo La Tengo & Cash: Kurt Russel hangs out with a less-than-relevant band
Men In Blackface: Horribly offensive romp where racist vaudevillians save the planet
Midnight In The Garden of Good and Evil Dead 2: A local millionaire is murdered by a dismembered, possessed hand in this campy thriller crime drama
Citizen Kano: Australian born Kano gets his citizenship and has a brush with materialism in this 1941 Mortal Kombat offshoot
The Deer Hunter S. Thompson: Hunter S. Thompson plays Russian Roulette for 3 hours
No Country For Old Men At Work: 2 garbage men spy on their neighbors with a telescope and find some dead bodies, a stash of heroin and more than $2 million in cash
There Will Be Blood In, Blood Out: A story about family, greed, religion, and oil, centered around a turn-of-the-century prospector in the early days of East L.A. Latino gangs.
Gone With The Windtalkers: Scarlett O’hara learns the Navajo code for 7 hours
A Street Car Named “Desiree:” Marlon Brando stars twice in this film about Napoleon Bonaparte tormenting a disturbed Blanche Dubois in New Orleans
Fargo Baby Gone: Two Boston area detectives investigate a little girl’s kidnapping in Minnesota
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless, Dangerous Minds: Michelle Pfeiffer teaches ghetto children to forget all about their baby daddies
A League of Extraordinary Gentleman of Their Own: Gena Davis and Tank Girl play baseball as men in an alternate Victorian age world
