Halloween costume idea achieved: I’m going to be a binder full of Catwoman.
one of my greatest weaknesses has always been my tendency to see everything in absolutes.
something is good or something is bad. something is 100% going to happen or 100% not going to happen. I either like and participate in something or I don’t, ever.
do you know what this is called? very, dangerously inaccurate.
it used to be so convenient. it made my life as a doormat far too easy. I would get a piece of information that caused me to reevaluate something in my life, and then with great determination and energy I would change course in a very absolute way. for instance, when I stopped adhering to Christianity, I did so often by completely discounting anything that I considered “Christian,” even if those were things that I could acknowledge were valid ways of living.
this has caused a number of destructive situations in my life, which I have brought almost fully upon myself and often spin up into with a weird sort of glee, because it’s helpful for abdicating responsibility.
thank fucking god I have someone stubborn and loving enough to remind me that the world isn’t black and white, that not everything (and few things at all, really) have a moral absolute, and that many things have no moral requirement at all. “just…enjoy what’s right in the moment,” Jake told me last night.
it took me a long time to fall asleep, because I kept thinking about how, try as I might, I can’t make moments happen, and I certainly can’t make them happen a specific way. I can influence how I approach a situation, yes, but ultimately I am responsible for my behavior and choices and don’t get to place the blame for any unhappiness I encounter on the “fact” that, well, I don’t participate in X because it’s wrong, or, well, I only said X because I thought it was right.
nope. nope nope nope. especially not when this behavior drags down the biggest-hearted, most supportive and loving man I’ve ever met. I want to take moments as they come – scoop them up and roll around in them and revel in them with the solid warmth of my other half behind me.
Resilience is an ongoing, delicate process balancing toughness and tenderness.
I had actually checked fb first because that was one of the tabs I had open when I shut down last night. But thank you for letting me know about this! This prompt was tailor-made for me.
If anyone else (*coughJessecough*) is interested, you all should check this out!
of course, the day I get two decent story ideas is the day I find a THIRD one.
but this is great. I love the prompt.